I PEE ON THE CAKE I TAKE MY VIATMINS LIKE A GOOD BOY THEN I PEE ON THE CAKE IS THIS YOUR CAKE ? I PEE ON THE CAKE DONT PEE ON CUPCKES CHOCOLATE CAKE OR WHITE CAKE I PEE ON THE CAKE I MAKE CAKE I MAKE FROSTING I PEE IN FROSTING AND SO…
The Illuminati would like to take this opportunity to thank Stephen Colbert for being such a wonderful and loyal servant to the organization. Many years ago, Stephen contacted HQ and expressed a deep desire to belittle and control people. Naturally, this piqued our interest and we decided to see just how serious he was about…
I love you. I really do. I’m not screwing with you, either. After WordPress upgraded to 2.7, something which I never cared to notice became hilariously apparent. When it comes to the two most popular posts on this blog, between our Obama announcement and our expose on Vince Offer – Obama nabbed 61% of the…
For some reason, this blog was tagged for the Kreativ Blogger Award by ElfNinosMom of Adventures in Frickintardistan, one of our co-conspirators. Normally, I would ignore such a thing, but I saw what she did to that Turkish elm using only a pair of pliers and a gummy bear..and well, that was nothing short of…
The Illuminati have completed an investigation into ShamWow and Vince Offer. “Investigation” might be a stretching it a little bit. “Little bit” as in “beyond the limits of reality.” We pronounced them guilty before Vince was a tickle in his daddy’s pants. For those who are still sober enough to read, ShamWow and Vince Offer…
Early yesterday morning, my beloved wolverpus escaped from his cell during a routine feeding. After gorging himself on the idiot intern who left the door unlocked, he manipulated the elevator system into allowing him roof access and leaped to a nearby building. By the time the black helicopters arrived to subdue him with the hash…
It’s that time of year again, the time of year when every fiber of my being fills with so much joy that I very nearly implode in a subatomic wave of Turkish toenails and pomegranates. Yes, it’s time to torture the interns who are still in the building…I mean evaluate their performance and assist them…